I really do want to start the new year off right, however I think it would be silly to create a list of resolutions when I really haven’t scratched everything off last year’s. Actually, I’m not even sure I made a list last year. The beginning of 2012 was quite busy as I was starting my second to last semester at UCF, which was my resolution after finishing high school - get a bachelor’s degree. But, I stopped working on that one twenty years ago. Clearly I like the no pressure approach to my resolutions.
Having three kids, a husband in law school and going to school full time myself last year left no room for any other tasks to check off on a list anyway. I have, however, received my degree now, so a new resolution may be in order. I’ve been reading other people’s lists to see if I might want to adopt a few, but they’re really everyday things I strive to do anyway. Be a better person. Try to lose a few pounds. Be more organized. Be more patient with things I cannot control. Shower daily - okay, I added this one, but amazingly enough this is a challenge sometimes with three kids, therefore list worthy.
Perhaps the only thing I should really be resolved to do this year is continue to not plan anything and just go with the flow. My life not going according to my mapped-out design is the one thing that has led to resentment, which is just bad - for anyone. Naturally, a more relaxed approach to life seems like a good resolution for 2013. I found this quote a while back by writer Joseph Campbell where he sums it up rather nicely:
We must be willing to get rid of the life we planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
It's a work in progress applying that little nugget of advice whether its for my kids, my marriage or just little ol’ me. I’m not referring to little things like planning a kid’s birthday party, but I guess even then it still may apply. For example, let's say you bought a piñata and painstakingly filled with sugary treats, but it won’t break despite the repeated beatings from impatient children. What's a mom to do? Well, she resorts to using her son’s baseball bat, cursing under her breath and finally ripping it apart with her bare hands. Purely hypothetical of course, and probably not what Campbell meant, but you get my drift.
So, maybe it is the little things we plan as it’s all about adaptability, right? According to Merriam-Webster, adaptation is a modification that makes one more fit for existence under the conditions of their environment. If there’s anything I have become, it’s adaptable. I adapted to marriage. I adapted to each of my three children. I adapted to five different cities. I even adapted to a family franchise business with my in-laws (don’t try to wrap your head around that one). I think my biggest personal adaptation is generating enough courage to go back to college and sit amongst students who I could have easily given birth to. In-laws don’t sound so bad compared to that, I assure you.
And, to finish Campbell’s thought, there is one other thing I can do this year, follow my bliss. A bit odd
sounding, I know, but since I fancy quotes, here’s another fabulous thing he wrote:
If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Wherever you are—if you are following your bliss, you are enjoying that refreshment, that life within you, all the time.
I haven’t quite picked it apart to make it apply to my life, but I’m prepared to call it a resolution. It’s not always easy to smile when things don’t go my way and I very much despise that old adage that everything happens for a reason. Ugh, it’s the absolute worst thing to say to someone who is disappointed in love, life or simply when their ice cream falls off the cone onto their lap. Oh, then there’s the other one people use when they don’t know what to say, “It wasn’t meant to be.” Really? My ice cream wasn’t meant to be eaten? Did you apply your study of Socrates’ method to figure that one out? I must know.
But, I digress. I just really want to be one of those people with a stupid grin on my face when a plan goes awry. Not because I don’t care, but because I have found a way to be content with my life no matter what's thrown at me. I want laugh when I accidently add a cup of salt instead of sugar to the cookies I'm making for my daughter's class party. Actually, I want to cry, but then I want to laugh because it's no big deal...even though it is a big deal because I used the last of the chocolate chips...but I can just go buy more, right?
Oh, I almost forgot - Ha...ha...ha.
See, I'm making progress already. How are you doing with your resolutions?
My photo adventures in Florida